Dating Tips: Keeping the Girl
submitted: Jul 30th 2008 |
by: VinDiCarlo
Total views: 8 |
Word Count: 762 |
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Just when I know how to escalate and get good with women quickly, I think of those women I slept with but couldn't keep around.
And it's quite sad.
There are so many women that has the ability to be a great girlfriend.
But I had my brain up my butt.
...maybe that's a little harsh.
But it comes to TWO different problems:
First, I was working hard to prove something to myself. I was still a recovering nerd but I've never fully recovered. And I've stopped trying to recover. And that's what's made me move past this "proving myself" thing.
I've accepted what I am.
Sure, I like comic books and video games.
But...
Do you think women have cooler interests?
Is shopping, getting drunk and Myspace are cooler than what I'm into?
It's all have connection.
What it really need is self-acceptance.
A woman won't accept you if you don't accept yourself.
Can you imagine a woman wanting to be your girlfriend when you don't like yourself?
She will HATE to be with you and not wanting to be around with you.
Because you can't really like a woman, if you don't like yourself. And if you do like her, but not yourself, then you look like a total loser. And who do you think wants to date a loser?
Although it sounds easy, self-acceptance is extremely rare. How often do you hear people say, "I don't care what anyone thinks of me!"
Almost NO ONE accepts themselves completely, that's in my experience.
And I'm not excepted from them.
How you accept yourself is how women find you attractive, and people likes to be around you.
It can be really hard to accept yourself more. Old beliefs creep in and tell you that you are not enough, that you must be more than you are.
The degree to which your game becomes better is if you know the degree to which you stop these thoughts.
Because game is really about being yourself, not doubting yourself. And game doesn't stop after your opener, after "mating", after a few dates. It never stops.
Because it is you.
You are not divided from your game.
Your game IS YOU. This game is the degree to which you can demonstrates who you are.
"But I'm nervous and insecure and awkward" you might be thinking. I disagree. That's not you.
That is the indistinct you.
That is you trying to come out, but the one that stop you from expressing what you really want to express is your ego and your old mental habits.
Before I get too deep into that, I want to move on to the second reason why I couldn't keep women around after I slept with them.
I'm not conscious about shaping.
Shaping is all about knowing what YOU want. You can't shape if you don't know what you want. The extension of self-acceptance is knowing what you want.
In fact, what applied to others is self-acceptance. You know what you like, and you encourage girls to be that for you.
You see, women are very flexible. They have many sides that they can reveal to a man. Men usually implicitly tell women to be selfish, mean, and act like they are better than the man.
But it's not really her fault. She's just doing what she's told. Women are always looking to men to get a sense of reality.
So if you come to a woman and treat her like she's on a pedestal, she will act accordingly.
If you talked and treat a woman like she's lucky you approached her, she'll feel that way.
Likewise, after mating, if you treat her like she should stay in your life and nurture your lifestyle, she will do so.
We go into this heavily in our workshops. I've developed lots of ways to shape a woman to be EXACTLY the kind of woman I want in my life.
And women are different from each other. For example, I may want another woman to be a sugar mama! I may want one woman to be just a partner in bed. I may want another one to be a girlfriend. It all depends on what we want.
I used to remember all the crappy, frustrating relationships I have.
Also I think all the hookups I had as a young pickup artist, and how frustrating it was not see those women again.
But when I began to accept myself and analyze what I wanted, it all came together.
The Attraction Code is all about figuring out who you are, accepting and cultivating your character, and then applying that to the women you want to meet, sleep with, and date.
The Attraction Code is a MUST HAVE if you are struggling with self acceptance and letting the real YOU shine.
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